Why dry February?

Well here goes, why dry February, because I drink too much and this week I managed to scare myself with the help of google.

Other than my well documented mental health issues, I have suffered from regular pins and needles in my right arm since pulling my shoulder last September 2019. I broke my leg in 2012 which still gives me grief from time to time and I’m very overweight. I know, had I been a horse, I would have been shot by now.

****************************

I have had a constant mouth ulcer now for a few weeks, first appeared before Christmas but I managed to treat it with bonjela, it went, but came back again. Now I’m not sure if it’s to do with my top plate, yes my front top teeth are false, but that’s a whole different story.

So I googled, it seems one of the reasons for mouth ulcers is brought on my alcohol abuse, I mean define alcohol abuse? Oh and these ulcers if constant, maybe the ‘C’ word, yes, scared me that much, I can’t even spell it out.

I now have a Drs appointment for this Tuesday, I’m sure it’ll just be a telling off for drinking too much, being overweight and medication for mouth ulcers. But a lifestyle change message none the less.

*******************************

What have I been drinking? Not far off 100 units a week I reckon. Often a litre bottle of gin and two bottles of a wine bought on a Thursday, would be gone by Sunday night. Then there was the trip out Monday, maybe for a 75cl bottle of gin and one more bottle of wine, add this to any beer I may have at a weekend if i venture out.

It was helping me sleep, chill out, relax… but it was too much, I know. If I am to be honest, most of my weight issue is probably due to alcohol. I am currently 18st 7lbs, the heaviest I have ever been, let’s see what I weigh on March 1st.

******************************

There are a million and one reasons to look after myself and none more important than family. When Riley hits 18 I will already be 73!! I cant afford to live like I have been if I want to see these boys at least through their school years and on.

I won’t give up drinking completely, I like it, i enjoy it, I just need to learn to be less dependent on it. To maybe just keep it for a Friday/Saturday, or crikey, learn to have one or two glasses without the need to finish the bottle.

This is why I am going to try a dry month, rather than a couple of weeks. I’m hoping if I can navigate February, then I can change my habit. I will then know it’s a habit and not an addiction.

********************************

Why have I have I blogged this, because it’s good to share a worry, a concern. I am always preaching this and to be honest, I bet I’m not alone. I have identified a problem, a possible life threatening problem, I need to act and I’m hoping I have the strength to do this. As usual my friends on Instagram will be a main source of support as well as close loved ones around.

So anyone else hiding behind a glass? Have a think, look closely at your lifestyle, do you need to make a slight adjustment even, remember it’s not just for you, but for those that hold you dear 💙

As always, your comments are welcome below, thankyou 💙